Last Night: FOJ

The term FOB became popular during Bill Clinton's administration, referring to the president's inner circle, the Friends Of Bill. Some have continued to use FOB for Friends of Barack, for the current president's closest pals and advisors, including friends from Chicago, grad school, and a few going all the way back to his years in Hawaii.

"Many people call Obama aloof, and he hasn't made a lot of friends in Washington," [Douglas] Brinkley said. "When you're president, everybody wants something from you and only these types of friends are able to simply want your well-being. They have a different level of affection for you than friends you meet later in life." (Meet Obama's Hawaiian Posse, AP/HuffPo, 12/30/14)

In the first century world of Rome, the phrase "friend of the emperor" was in common use (although I doubt they shortened it to FOE). It carried much the same meaning as the FOBs today.

According to one scholar, a true Friend of the Emperor would be known for his frankness:

In the first-century world of the New Testament, discussions of friendship moved from a friendship ideal to focus on the more pragmatic realities of patron-client relationships and on the political expediency captured in expressions like “friend of the emperor”. One of the main distinguishing marks of a friend in this context was the use of “frank speech” (parrēsia). Philosophers counseled the patron to be on the lookout for whether “friends” were speaking honestly and openly or whether they were engaging in flattery to further their own ends. . . According to the Hellenistic philosophers, to be someone’s friend was to speak frankly and honestly to them and to hold nothing back. (I Have Called You Friends, Gail R. O'Day, Center for Christian Ethics at Baylor University)

We think of Peter, Andrew, James, and John as FOJs, His inner circle. Jesus, though, invites all His followers to be FOJs.

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.  You are my friends if you do what I command.  I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.  You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit—fruit that will last—and so that whatever you ask in my name the Father will give you.  This is my command: Love each other.  John 15:13-17

Like the "friends of the emperor", there is a clear understanding of a patron-client relationship underlying the friendship. Jesus is not saying we are all his casual pals.

Like the  emperor, Jesus cherishes the"frank speech" of His friends. To be an FOJ is to be open and honest with Him.

The best example of an FOG (Friend of God) being frank and direct is David, who was describe as a man after God's own heart. The Psalms are filled with David's questions toward God, some of them quite blunt. The psalmist takes it upon himself to remind his friend of His promises, wondering out loud whether He intends to follow through. In the end, though, David always finishes with praise and trust in God, not presuming to be an equal.

Some of the questions the disciples asked Jesus on this last night, as well as during the preceding three years, were open and honest, sometimes blunt. They obviously felt comfortable enough with their friend to not be intimidated when talking to Him.

If your prayer life seems stale and lacking intimacy, maybe it's because you're not accepting Jesus' invitation to be an FOJ. He wants to hear everything that's on your mind.