My doctor and I are both very pragmatic people, so he prescribed a simple 2-word course of treatment:
Lose weight.I had been hovering between 300-310 pounds for a few years, pretty much ever since I switched from a physically active job to a desk job. I had basically eaten myself into being diabetic.
The doctor and I also share a fascination with technology, so he recommended I download the MyFitnessPal app for my iPhone.
It proved to be a great help as I proceeded to lose 50 pounds in about 6 months. I entered everything I was eating into the app, and it kept a running total of the calories and carbs for the day. That feedback helped me to build a detailed awareness and knowledge in my mind of how to construct my daily meals in order to be a more healthy eater.
The app also lets me record my weight and then shows me graphs of my progress over the past month, 3 months, year, and so on. I've developed the habit of working out at the local gym 4 times a week, and the first thing I do when I arrive there is to step on the scale and record my weight.
That graph not only keeps me aware of how I'm doing, but it also taught me that even though my weight can fluctuate up to 5 pounds from one day to the next (sometimes for no apparent reason), over the long run I can see the long term progress.
Then again, that graph can be like a stern taskmaster, pointing out to me when I've been less than diligent in my eating and exercising.
You see, I lost 50 pounds in 6 months, and then I've lost maybe another 10-15 pounds in the 17 months since. While the doctor tells me that losing a pound a month is a healthy approach, the up and down yo-yo of the MyFitnessPal graph never lets me forget that that slower progress is more an indication of how lax I've become about my habits. It's not a steady 15-pound decline over those months. It's a binge-and-diet sort of decline.
Sigh.
I don't understand why I can't be as diligent as I was at the beginning. I want to stick to the plan, but I don't. I hate cheating on my healthy foods plan, but I still cheat. When I stick to it, MyFitnessPlan is my best friend. But even though the app gives me everything I need and motivates me to do what is good, I cannot carry it out. Instead of eating right, I revert to the old habits I hate. (Romans 7:14-25)Meditating on the Word gives me so much that I need. Like MyFitnessPal, when I regularly read and absorb the scriptures, they teach my mind and train my heart to know how to live my daily life the way that is best for me. As I continue to dive deep into the bible, it often rebukes me, pointing out the ways I've gotten off track. And then it corrects me, giving me the information and motivation I need to get back with the program. Steadfastly continuing my journey through His Word trains my heart to be inline with God's heart, and trains me to be the kind of person who will be thoroughly equipped for every good work. (II Timothy 3:16-17)
And then...I fail again. And return to the Word and its promises.
What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord! (Romans 7:24-25)
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